4th of July - Finding Deeper Appreciation for the American Story
An immigrant’s perspective
Happy 4th of July to all my readers!
As an immigrant and American Citizen, today I am particularly grateful for this one reason I feel at home here.
This near final version of chapter one in my upcoming Little Book of Big Reasons to Love America is about the extraordinary value of blending cultures. In a time of intense polarization, I think you’ll find it refreshing.
If you like this, forward this to someone who would love reading it this 4th of July and sign up to be the first to know when the book is published in the fall.
You can be from anywhere and be an American
"The bosom of America is open to receive not only the Opulent and respectable Stranger, but the oppressed and persecuted of all Nations and Religions; whom we shall welcome to a participation of all our rights and privileges..."
- George Washington
The Blending of Colors
In a global mosaic of countless tribes, America is the canvas where the colors blend well. We are the most successful multi-cultural democracy in the world. Yet, this blending of cultures is neither easy nor flawless. I have visited over 40 countries and learned this: everywhere I go, there are insiders and outsiders. For better or worse, humans are tribal.
We form tribes along ethnic and socioeconomic lines. We affiliate by faith, politics, or our stance on social issues. We argue over sports teams, the schools we attended, or whether to use Android or iOS phones. We are insiders in some circles and outsiders in others. Tribes within tribes.
Unlike any other country I’ve been to, America is a place with a collective awareness that almost everyone’s family came from somewhere else. A culture built by outsiders finds ways for tribes to fit together. Along the borders of these tribes, sparks can fly until a new blend emerges—a new thing that clashes with other new things. And so it goes. While this dynamic exists everywhere to an extent, in America, it is a defining characteristic. A place where outsiders can find belonging.
Uniquely so, you can be from anywhere—a French-American, Brazilian-American, or Turkish-American—and be fully accepted as an American. In contrast, in most other countries, you can be a citizen and still be perceived as an outsider. An Argentine living in France, a Ukrainian in Portugal, a Chilean in Mozambique. Due to the eclectic geography of my youth, I’ve been an outsider everywhere I’ve lived. When people ask me what culture from my mixed heritage I identify most with, I say—I feel more American than anything else. Although I immigrated to the US as an adult, this is home for me more than any other place on earth.
America is Third Culture
I'm objectively strange because I'm what they call a Third Culture Kid, or TCK for short. It's a real thing—look it up. TCKs blend their original culture with the cultures they live in, creating a unique "third culture." When someone asks us where we’re from, we might respond, “Do you want the one-minute answer or the 20-minute one?” We suffer from a different kind of jet lag—cultural confusion. We’re not citizens of the world; we’re citizens of everywhere and nowhere at the same time. We also have a distinct superpower: an eclectic view of life and the ability to adapt. For us, things that don’t go together on the surface make total sense, and if nothing is certain, then anything is possible. The downside is never feeling at home in single-culture places—unless, of course, we’re lucky enough to live in a Third Culture Country. A country built by outsiders, where blending ideas and adapting to new realities drive the culture, and anything is possible. A place where our kind of strange is normal.
Let me illustrate the roots of my cultural confusion. By age nine, I had learned four languages: Spanish and Russian from birth, Portuguese by immersion in Mozambique, and English at the local International School.
Our family meals were a linguistic tapestry. Mom would say something in Russian. Dad might reply in either Russian or Spanish. My sister and I would chime in with Portuguese or chat with each other in English. If Mom and Dad didn’t want us to understand, they could always deploy their French. Sometimes, we’d mix two languages in the same sentence to better express what we wanted to say. It sounded strange from the outside, but that was our normal.
As I said—objectively strange.
The American dinner table is similarly eclectic and often disharmonious on the surface. Yet, something magical happens when we embrace this eclecticism and make it our norm.
People who came to America created a Third Culture country. They came to either escape from something or aspire to something, making dangerous voyages into the unknown, often out of sheer desperation. They saw the world not as it was but as it could be and came to America knowing very little about the hardships they would face. They were forced to not just think outside the box but redefine the box altogether. Most of the early settlers only knew that they were giving away land for free across the ocean. Many learned when they arrived that there were other people living on much of that land who were willing to fight back. Between the harsh conditions, disease, and violent clashes with Native Americans, many lost their lives before they even laid eyes on the land they came to claim.
My wife Deb’s great-grandfather, Ugo Perfetti, came to America in 1910 at age 18 with his two older brothers onboard S.S. La Provence. The records at Ellis Island show his hometown to be a village deep in the mountains of Tuscany called Fanano. We visited that village a few years ago and spent a delightful few hours with extended family, connecting threads of memories, names, and stories into the tapestry of a more complete story. We know that one of the reasons Ugo Perfetti left the breathtaking beauty of his homeland was to escape the grip of the Italian mafia. The brothers were so eager to assimilate that they insisted their children not speak Italian. They would say: “You’re in America now, speak American.”
They wanted to be fully American in a country that gave them the opportunity to start a new life.
Clash. Combine. Create a Remix.
"Jazz has always been a melting pot of influences and I plan to incorporate them all.”
— Esperanza Spalding
E Pluribus Unum - Out of Many, One
This idea permeates the American story, appearing on our passports, our money, and the seals of all three branches of our government. Diverse people, ideas, and traditions, often seemingly incompatible, given a chance to co-exist, can combine in surprising ways to create a remix—a new thing. From the outside looking in, life in America can seem rough around the edges and chaotic. Under the surface, we create new things better than anyone else. It’s no surprise that Jazz and Hip-Hop are quintessential American art forms.
This unique culture arose from circumstances that are far from guaranteed to continue. If we learn anything from history, it’s that progress is never automatic. It can easily dwindle and die in a generation or two. A successful multi-racial democracy depends on relegating some of our tribal affiliation to the idea of being an American. What we’ve seen in the last decade or so is an accelerated regression into tribalism.
The strength of America has always been its ability to host a multitude of voices and allow disparate ideas to clash, birthing innovation and progress. When we prioritize identity politics over convictions, ideologies over values, and outrage over solutions, we risk creating echo chambers where wisdom is lost in divisiveness.
This escalating polarization threatens the core of what makes the American conversation powerful: the belief that we can disagree yet still find common ground. Reducing complex individuals to single dimensions based on their affiliations strips away our nuanced identities. When identity politics and cancel culture dominate, we fragment into smaller tribes, each suspicious of the others.
I’ve spent decades in countries where the will, culture, and ideology of one group keep the rest disempowered and oppressed. I treasure the opportunity to thrive here because I can both contribute and learn without being an outsider.
If America stops remixing—we all lose.
“Everywhere immigrants have enriched and strengthened the fabric of American life."
— John F. Kennedy
“As an immigrant entrepreneur, I've learned that adversity fuels innovation. It's what pushes us to think differently, dream bigger, and achieve the impossible."
— Brian Chesky
“Immigrants are the lifeblood of creativity and innovation. They bring new perspectives, fresh ideas, and boundless energy to every endeavor they undertake."
— Arianna Huffington
“As an immigrant artist, I draw inspiration from my diverse background and experiences. It's what makes my work unique and resonates with audiences around the world."
— Lin-Manuel Miranda
“As an immigrant, I have experienced firsthand the incredible opportunities that America offers to those who are willing to work hard and dream big."
— Elon Musk
“As an immigrant, I've always felt a deep connection to America and its ideals of freedom and opportunity."
— Salma Hayek
“Coming to America was the greatest gift I ever received. It gave me the opportunity to pursue my dreams and build a life I could only have imagined."
— Arnold Schwarzenegger
“Leaving behind everything I knew was the hardest decision I ever made, but it was also the bravest. It took courage to step into the unknown and chase my dreams."
— Jackie Chan
“As an immigrant artist, I've learned that home is not a place; it's a feeling. It's the warmth of community, the embrace of loved ones, and the knowledge that you are exactly where you're meant to be."
— Priyanka Chopra