Burn the Playbook. Own The Game
Christian Ray Flores here,
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Burn the Playbook. Win Back Time
My youngest daughter “spilled the tea” about a new boyfriend while visiting us in Puerto Vallarta. Shhh — the hard launch is still pending for her 200K+ Instagram followers. Not that any of them are subscribed to the XE newsletter.
Over dinner overlooking the bay, she gave us the play-by-play. What moved Deb and me most was that she said no three times before saying yes — because she wanted him to meet us first. Our approval mattered. That kind of trust isn’t accidental. It’s built.
Long ago, Deb and I made a decision: to lavishly spend the most unscalable resource we have — time — on our kids. To weave our lives tightly with theirs so closeness became the default, not the exception.
Here’s the hard truth: you get about 19 years with your children.
Eighteen under your roof, and one cumulative year after they leave. Total. Unless you decide not to become a statistic.
To break the math, you need agency. You need to fight for your time — the freedom, margin, and energy to invest in what and who matters most. That’s inseparable from living a high-performance life and building a personal brand that funds it.
It wasn’t easy for us. It was irrational at times. We invested lavishly into our marriage and kids when we “couldn’t afford it.” When it forced us to get creative and bend life around our priorities, not the other way around. Best investment we ever made. The dividends keep compounding, long past the 19 years.
And it’s not just us. A friend of mine went from the pain of losing a job to designing life around surfing with his kids in one of the most expensive parts of the U.S. Why? Because he chose to buy back his time. Another friend I mentor shifted his investment firm from volume to vitality — he reclaimed his hours, his joy, and the respect of his community. Proof that this shift isn’t theory. It works.
Here are 5 moves to buy back your time — and your life:
5 Moves to Buy Back Your Time
1. Break the Math
Refuse to be a statistic. Nineteen years isn’t enough. Ask: What would it take to design life around what matters most? That revolt is the spark.
2. Audit the Thieves
Most of your time is stolen, not spent. Meetings, “good soldier” projects — all thieves dressed as opportunities. Audit them ruthlessly.
3. Install Rhythms of Margin
Freedom isn’t found, it’s fought for. From weekly date nights to blocked “deep work” hours, rhythms protect what matters most.
4. Turn Expertise Into Leverage
When your expertise lives only in your head, it’s a job. When you productize it — frameworks, IP, assets — it multiplies without draining more hours.
5. Build a Brand That Works While You Rest
The ultimate play is when your brand makes you undeniable — opportunities chase you because you’re visible and trusted.
All our lives, we’re handed playbooks.
Some well-intentioned: study hard, get the degree, climb the ladder.
Some suffocating: keep your head down, don’t rock the boat.
They’re built for safety. For predictability. For average.
But they weren’t written for your values, convictions, or mark on the world.
At some point, you have to burn the playbook you were handed and own the game you’re built for.
That’s what Deb and I did. When logic said “work harder, provide more,” we torched that script and rewrote it: lavish time on marriage, children, and friends who feel like family. Even when it looked irrational. Even when it made no financial sense.
That one decision — to torch the safe playbook — forced us to create our own game: entrepreneurship, creativity, brand-building, freedom. Harder. Scarier. More uncertain. And the best move we’ve ever made.
The average parent gets 19 years.
But averages are for people who stick to the playbook.
The exception — the ones who burn it — get a lifetime.
👉 Reply TIME and tell me one thief you’re ready to cut.