Who you Marry = How High you Fly
The Valentine's Day Headspace Post
Before meeting her, I did a lot of work reimagining what love and marriage could be. I come from three generations of broken homes and needed a makeover in beliefs and skills to support my upgraded views.
When I met Deb ( @debdeflores) at a conference in Los Angeles, I was ready.
I had eyes to see and ears to hear. I canceled important commitments to spend as much time with her as possible before flying home. I called her daily from New York, where I was visiting family. Then, I emailed her daily until she moved to be with me. This was before FaceTime, Skype, and WhatsApp.
Just a few months later, I took her to a castle on top of a mountain in Sochi to propose. She was leaning on me as we admired the breathtaking view. My cover was almost blown as my heart beat fast against her back. I quickly turned her around and nervously proposed.
We have been married for 24 years, delighting in our three daughters, and I still want to spend every hour of every day with her.
As an entrepreneur, artist, and leader, I fly higher and go further because of Deb’s wisdom, partnership, and love.
She has stuck by me through my mistakes, patiently waited for me to become aware of my blind spots, and has been the source of many of my best moves.
The name Headspace for this newsletter and YouTube channel was her idea.
Deb has supported me through recalibrating and reinventing my career time and time again.
Speaking of which…
I’ll be sharing my mistakes and learned wisdom on Recalibrating and Reinventing a Career in my free webinar on March 9th, Saturday - 12PM CST.
Some of the questions we’ll tackle with a Q&A at the end:
- How to create opportunities for promotion
- How to determine if your current job is a dead-end
- How to make the transition from a job to a calling
- How to make the jump into starting your own business
- How to create a mindset of possibility
Claim your spot here. Forward this to friends.
Deb believes in me when I doubt. So, I start believing in myself on a different level.
She is quicker and smarter than I am.
She is more loving and thoughtful than I am.
She has a faith that deepens my faith.
She is beloved as a mentor and leader.
She takes my breath away with her presence.
I love this quote from Alex Hormozi, whose wife and business partner Leila told him at a low point that she would live under a bridge with him if that’s what it came to.
"More people are terrified to lose what they have than to not achieve what they’re capable of. When those fears flip, you become dangerous.” - Alex Hormozi
Who you marry will play a central role in discovering what you can achieve.
If you’re single, work on yourself and marry well.
If you’re married, work on yourself for your marriage to flourish.
Your marriage will determine the quality and very trajectory of your life.
To mark Valentine’s Day week, enjoy a re-published special episode of Headspace: 17 Secrets to a Great Marriage. Lots of hard-learned wisdom and stories packed into one episode, including a song I wrote for her before we even met, which I performed as part of my vows during the not-so-intimate wedding ceremony.
What I’m reading: Twitter (or X) is my micro-reading source. I only follow people who can help me grow. My handle is @chrisitianray
Today, my shout-out is to @ItsKieranDrew - he writes beautifully about writing, which I do a lot of.
What I’m watching: We just wrapped up the Mr. and Mrs. Smith mini-series. One of the very few spin-offs from a movie that is completely original while keeping the core concept of the film with Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie. Donald Glover and Maya Erskine are brilliant in it.
Book writing update: I’m writing my Little Book of Big Reasons to Love America almost daily. Paid subscribers will be able to track my writing chapter by chapter and get a signed copy when it’s published. The first chapter is dropping very soon!
Thanks for being a subscriber. I hope to improve your life just a little through the insights, videos, and resources I share here.